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When god gave women the ability to bear children, some would also say that god gave us the privilege to bear children. It wasn’t until I first held our first son did I really come to that recognition. Sure, after two hours of intense labor and equally intense bitter rage, I swore to whoever would listen, especially my husband, that I was NOT going through that again. And I know I’m not alone in that thought process. But, there I was, not two years later, pushing out number 2. I have to say, the thought did occur to us to consider number 3. But after some head-banging, we realized that even though we assumed we would have the necessary stamina at 45 (very debatable now), would we really WANT to force the issue at 50? I have to admit, though, I just loved being pregnant. I loved feeling my belly as it grew and maneuvered around. I loved the anticipation of a newborn. I loved reading each chapter of “What to Expect When You’re Expecting”, dutifully following with each month, never readin...

HOW’S THIS FOR RE-DEFINING MYSELF…. I just went to yet ANOTHER 50th birthday party. This time it was for a college friend that I reconnected with through FACEBOOK. We hadn’t seen each other since college, so there was a lot of “filling in the blanks. ” She went around the table explaining to others how each friend was connected to her. As she did, she made mention how well we all had done by noting that “Deb” was a teacher, “Cathy” was an exec with Verizon, “Patty” was a high level government employee and “Norma” was an attorney. Like I said, it had been awhile since we last spoke – 3 lifetimes ago. The “filling in the blank ” hadn’t yet started. I didn’t feel like this was the moment to correct or explain where I REALLY “ WAS ” today. I have no problem telling people that I no longer practice law. In fact, I receive more applause for taking the initiative to WALK AWAY from law than I received for going into law. What’s this world coming to when a “used car” salesperson is situa...

It’s 6:30 in the morning and I’m sitting at the breakfast table reading the morning paper and having my first cup of “half caf” coffee (we’ll touch on that later), when I come across an article of particular interest – “Stay at Home Moms”. I’m somewhat excited about the recognition, making the front page of the Post (lower left corner), and yet somewhat cautious of the premise. My “caution” was warranted. Apparently there was a recent study done that indicated that stay-at-home moms tended to be younger ( than what ?) and less educated. "Hello", I don’t recall anyone knocking on my door or the door of a number of “sophisticated, mature” acquaintances of mine who just happen to have “ opted out ” of traditional employment. The funny thing was the timing of this article. Its been nearly a year since I took my “leave” to become a full time MOM , and was finally coming to terms with my decision. I mean, come on people, I am part of a revolution – “opt-out revolution ”- made up...

I now realize that "CHANGES” don’t come WITHOUT costs. I had a brilliant idea that money could be used as an incentive for my kids. NOVEL IDEA! I arbitrarily decided (which is how I pretty much do most things) on an amount that could create an incentive and not burn a hole in my pocket. The boys would each earn $.50 a day by making their beds (meaning, pull covers up and pillow on), place yesterday’s clothes in the laundry room (separating whites from colors), bring dishes to the sink and take trash to garage. Through trial and error, I learned that weekly allowance wouldn’t work. We needed DAILY REINFORCEMENT, immediate gratification. They are SOOO like me….Not only that, they needed to actually see the money go from my pocket into their “bank” before they trusted that it was deposited. WHERE'S THE TRUST? To me this was a NO BRAINER. Easy tasks to get them started. Basic chores that they SHOULD be doing anyway. The idea of course was two-fold – doing things for themselves ...

I’m retired AGAIN. Or should I say, I‘ve just completed my latest chapter. This one took 5 years to complete. I now have time on my hands and am once again, trying to figure how to fill it up. At 48 years of age, I am still in search of “finding myself”. I was always told that I could “have it all”, but the problem is, I was never quite sure what that meant. Was it the combination of career, marriage and family? Or did it mean a combination of any of the three? Or did it mean that each one had to be successful individually, and when I say successful, I mean wealth, happy marriage and well adjusted kids…How’s two out of three??? When I look back over the course of my life, I realize that I never really had direction. I was never focused on any one goal or specific track. I went to law school partially in an effort to delay the inevitable, and partially because that was something my brother Mark was intending to pursue. I went into the family business because I was fortunate that it was ...